Dear Family,

I first want you to know that disagreements are a part of any relationship. Having them does not mean that a relationship will end. How you handle them though can determine how healthy that relationship remains. 

My first question is why did your mom think that your sister’s comments were about her? Had your sister said things like that about your mom before? Two things come to mind about this part of the situation. One, people have to be careful about what they post. Posting negative comments about others leads to drama, not solutions. Two, it is important to get clarity, not make assumptions. A more helpful response to seeing the posted comments would be “I saw the comment about someone being selfish and lazy. Tell me more about the situation that made you say that.” That response opens the door for a conversation that hopefully prevents the situation from escalating.  

You mentioned that you are in 5th grade. The events that you have shared involve the adults and the young adults around you: your mom, your sister who is a high school grad,and other adult family members. The world of adults is confusing to adults and can be even more confusing to you as a young person living in it. I will say this: sometimes people have things on their minds that may affect the way they behave. That may explain the way your mom has reacted recently.  If your concern about your family continues, try talking with her. You can wait until there is a quiet moment, choosing a time when your mom seems rested and in a good mood. You can start by letting her know that you have something worrying you and asking her if now is a good time to talk to her about it. If it is, share your concerns and see what she says. If it’s not, ask her when a better time would be and approach her then. 

It is clear that your family is important to you. Having good communication will keep those bonds strong. 

~Asalah